Never Writes About:
Ranking Games
(But really not ranking them)
Every so often on social media, there will be some sort of challenge or meme going around that requires participation. Something that requires you to reveal something about yourself. Usually something innocent and fun. How you take your coffee, favourite movies from childhood, how you rank states of matter, etc. Its a way for people to connect and learn about each other, thus forming a community. I have always been terrible at that. My anxiety makes doing all those things very difficult. So I’ve always just looked on enviously from the sidelines. But I’m trying to be different. I’m trying to confront these fears and just live like a normal person. Well, how I imagine a normal person to be. So I am proud to say that I recently participated in one such challenge. I’m not even sure if challenge is the correct term for what I did, but it was quite challenging for me so that’s what I’m calling it.
The ‘challenge’ was picking and listing the best video game by category. The categories were fairly standard fare such as ‘best story’, ‘favourite character’ and ‘best soundtrack’. But there were some wild cards categories like ‘needs a remake’ and ‘game everyone should play’ that further helped to reduce my reticence and induce my participation. Because I have many thoughts on those. So I went to grids.fun and made myself a grid.
Huh. Turns out instead of many thoughts I have exactly 1 thought on the games that need a remake and everyone should play. Anyway, after posting I felt a teeny tiny sense of accomplishment. I had exposed myself a little. Peeled back the skin. I was proud. But then I remembered Doki Doki Literature Club. Just a few days prior I had seen this story about the Google Play store delisting DDLC, and removing it stating the game “violates its terms of service in depiction of sensitive themes.” I reacted with a post on Bluesky where I stated quite pointedly, and honestly that the game had saved my life. Which it did. So how could I omit it from my list? Surely it would top the ‘most influential’ category, seeing as it saved my life. Baldur’s Gate 3, a game I have put almost 800 hundred hours into also did not make the cut. Stardew Valley, another game I have put hundreds of hours into and one I think about at least 3 times a week, also absent. metal Gear Solid 3, the game for years I considered the best of all time, and the origin of my PSN id, now seemingly forgotten. Mass Effect? Mass rejected. Actraiser? Couldn’t place her. Hitman? Hit the bricks, man. Uncharted? more like un-char oh that’s just the same.
So many of my favourite games, and so many memories pushed aside. And for what? Omno? I put Omno on my list? And under “not usually my thing” of all places. What was I thinking? I mean I like Omno just fine, better than fine even, but i think I was just trying to be original. Have a unique take and show off my broad, sophisticated gaming palate. By the time I had made my grid I had seen over a dozen with very similar games listed between them. It was slightly comical seeing people show a list that was titled About Me: Video Games, and its just a list of the most popular games ever made. This will not be some pretentious rant about what constitutes a real game or what real art is or whether AAA games are soulless. Takes like those are just brain rot rhetoric regurgitated by incurious forum posters and influencers in media that just want to keep you angry. Like whatever you like. Play whatever you play. I just think the purpose of these lists is to show your bones to the community. Your nooks and crannies. The weird little corners of your brain. I know you have them. But I’m getting sidetracked.
images taken from PlayOmno.com. Check it out on Steam or PlayStation or Switch!
This is about ranking games and the problem I have with ranking games. Or movies. Or TV shows. Or any Artful Escape. I think ranking these things is, at most, a fun thought exercise. A succinct way to reveal yourself and communicate your tastes. Harmless, really. But there are some (too many) that take these rankings very seriously. It seems whenever any major site or media outlet makes these rankings there is a not insignificant number of people that take umbrage with the results, questioning their validity. And they will argue, seriously, about whether Ocarina of Time is better than A Link to the Past.
I don’t seriously rank games. I do not have a single game I can confidently point to and say “This is the best game I have ever played.” I have games that I love. I have games that have moved me emotionally, affecting me in a deep and meaningful way. Games that have changed me as a person, and games that have informed my views on the world. On people. I can’t even fathom pitting those games against each other. Comparing them and weighing their value against each other. It is absurd to me. A big reason why I see absurdity in the practice for myself is I am uncertain whether or not I would feel the same about many of these games now compared to when I first played them.
When you rank games on a list, what you’re really ranking are your personal feelings at that stage in your life. I would have to replay each game now in order to properly and fairly evaluate them. So if I were to rank any game, I would , in essence, be ranking my past self against my current self. My memory from 5, 10, or 20 years ago versus my mind as it is now.
There are games, like Metal Gear Solid 3, that I was so enamoured with, obsessed with even, that they were practically my whole personality. I remember getting every single ‘code name’ rank over 30+ playthroughs. MGS3 became my whole life. I thought Kojima was a genius. That was 20 years ago. My thoughts now? Well, I played the original last year (MGS collection version) and Metal Gear Solid Delta a few months ago. I still love the game, but it’s not the same.
I’m just not as obsessed. Not as impressed. It is still impressive, just less so. Y’know, maybe I should have chosen a different game as an example because I’m thinking about it and MGS3 is still very very good. But it remains true that my feelings about it now are distinct from the feelings of my past self. There have been many more games since then. Many more experiences. The game mostly holds up. The game is the same. I am different.
So how does one rank that? Am I not meant to rank based on my current state? My current sensibilities? Beliefs? Politics? There is often talk of removing the art from the artist, usually after an artist of some renown is exposed as a piece of garbage, but what about removing oneself from the art? Is it possible to objectively rank an artistic endeavour, separate from our own feelings of said art?
Perhaps it is possible, but I can’t see a way to do it. Part of what makes art meaningful is the meaning we project onto it. Our subjective view of the art and how it relates to us in the moment we experience it. Our unique lived experience becomes one with the art, informing our interpretation of it.
Which is why I have so much trouble ranking games so definitively. Tasks like the grids.fun list are cool ways to connect with the community and celebrate the great experiences we’ve had playing games. But these lists must be allowed to be flexible, and malleable because we as people are flexible and malleable. That’s what I believe. We grow. We learn. Our tastes change. What was the greatest thing to us years ago could now just be satisfactory. And that’s ok.